Sunday 29 December 2013

Airports are by far one of the worst places to have a hangover


Airports are by far one of the worst places to have a hangover.

I couldn’t bare to bring the laptop out of the bag but I weighed it up with the predicaments of feeling sick and not keeping myself busy for the next half hour and keeping myself busy for the next half hour and not being physically sick.

If there’s one thing you don’t want when you’re dehydrated and not seeing straight is being assaulted by robots. So many damn robots in an international flight zone. They’ve got rid of check-in staff for those who want to cut time. No I don’t want to stand in an hour long queue full of angsty types so I have to approach one of those self check-in machines like at Tesco’s. It asks inane questions like did you pack your own bag, and yes I did, but if I hadn’t and I was trying to smuggle cocaine out of the country I wouldn’t admit it to a robot.

The lights are all bright and on in airports, like casinos you have no idea what time it is. You have to undress and redress and then take off your shoes and produce a document and it’s all a bit much for a hangover, which could be mistaken for one still being drunk.

Also I’d like to add, airport staff who are not wearing the hi-vis and are wearing different coloured tailored uniforms look like “normal” (that is virtually created) people in The Matrix. You know those types that Mr. Anderson can morph himself in to, the dispensable human beings you see in film who aren’t Neo or Trinity or whoever have names. Yeah, well flight attendants with their overall immaculate looks and purposeful walks could easily turn in to an Agent.

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